Monday, January 14, 2008

January 14, 2008

Therefore all the faithful will make their prayers to you (God) in time of trouble; when the great waters overflow, they shall not reach them.

You are my hiding-place; you preserve me from trouble; you surround me with shouts of deliverance (Psalm 32:7-8).

Ken has returned to Missouri and Sabine’s sister, Barbara, is getting us all ready to travel to the clinic for a blood-draw and consult with Sabine’s internal medicine physician, Dr. Gherlan in Madison.

Barbara has been a great blessing; taking charge of Sabine’s diet and giving Sabine some wonderful foot-massages and helping her relax. Barbara has some experience with all this have gone through her own struggle with cancer.

On my meditative walk in the woods this morning the words “hiding place” came to me. I knew it was from one of the psalms so I looked it up on my return. It is from Psalm 32 and reminded me that God is our hiding place in time of trouble.

I was also encouraged by a gentle reminder from my daughter, Jennifer, about the importance of reaching out. And I will. But I now find myself in a void of not-knowing. I know I must be patient -- but let’s name this thing, this beast, that we are fighting, “tell me your name!” I rage, so I can defeat you in God’s name. I am impatient. I want to get into this fight and conquer the beast that has invaded my beloved!

We went to the morning appointment at our clinic and were pleased to learn that the additional BP medication has lowered Sabine’s BP to an acceptable level (100/80)! She continues to be very tired and her low hemoglobin and low kidney function is no doubt some of the causes. Her physical last May showed normal blood work, so her medical problems have come on relatively quickly and her creatinine level still remains high at 5.9.

Our D-day is most likely going to be on Wednesday during our consult at the Cancer Clinic. I don’t know what the day will bring but whatever it is, whatever the journey, I am confident that God will be with us -- of that I am sure. God, you will preserve us from trouble; you will surround us with shouts of deliverance. Keep us all in your prayers! And thank you for your loving care…

1 comment:

  1. David,
    I was speechless when I read the blog - (I wept as I read it to Dale - the news caught both of off guard and caught our breaths) We had no idea you and Sabine were going through this. We are sorry you have to.

    The verse that came to mind as I began praying for you to have strength was "And a sword shall pierce your own side."

    I thought that odd, since it's a feminine reference - The angel's announcement to Mary - but then I remembered - one of the first sermons you gave in Portage was about Mary's strength. You asked God for His strength and I am certain he will give that to you, just as he did to Mary during her hours of watching her son suffer.

    When two become one, as you and Sabine have, you never suffer alone, you suffer together.

    Hey - there's a great shirt at Meriter Gift Shop - if you are in the area - I think you'll like it - perhaps a little blunt but great statement in contemporary language - I know I'm going to get one - Simply said it says "Cancer Sucks" How true is that?!!! (Smile) I think Jesus agrees - he might have even said that since he used contemporary language when he was on earth - Cancer sucks folks - but fear not! God will send His Holy Spirit to help you through it!

    Remember David, when you are holding her, she is holding you too. When one of you laughs, the other laughs, when one of you smiles, the other smiles - you reflect your souls and love to one another as if in a mirror - it is good enough to reflect that as you look at each other - words aren't always necessary.

    May the God of Peace give you His Holy Spirit as you continue to humble yourselves before Him. He is glorified and made strong in our weaknesses.

    May His strong arms surround you, carry you and guide your steps as you lean upon Him during this time.

    May wisdom be with all the medical staff who tend to your wife.

    May grace fill the hearts and minds of all your family and may the Lord have mercy upon all of you.

    May the Holy Spirit provide comfort to each of you.

    And remember - it's ok David to raise your head and cry "Daddy, up! Pick me up!" It's ok to cry and weep and sigh and moan, and yes, even scream if you have to.
    I feel like it - Sabine doesn't deserve this - nobody does - but especially not someone as full of sunshine as Sabine.

    In Love and Friendship,
    Dale and June