Cow Hunting!

After church today we decided to go to New Glarus for lunch -- and do a little "cow hunting!" (no tipping allowed!)

New Glarus is about 30 miles southeast of Blue Mounds and a village settled by Swiss immigrants in the 1860s.

Look what we found wandering the streets of this quaint Wisconsin village.

New Glarus is home of the William Tell Play, the Heidi festival and polka dance every weekend!

Sabine has a new goal to attain!

Blessings to all of you!

We start Week Two of the fourth round on Monday!

Snowy Saturday

From time to time I think the chemicals catch up with Sabine. I can't imagine what this is like -- having someone put poison into your body on a regular basis. But she holds up well and is always the positive thinker; and me, well most of you know me -- warily spying out the negative possibilities...

The nausea had been creeping up on Sabine and she is resting today. We were going to celebrate her mom's birthday today with Sarah and Josh coming over -- but Josh had two flat tires and Sarah had engine trouble. We will try and reschedule for next week.

This morning on my woodland walk with my trusty pooch, Mocha, I thought about my "warily spying out negative possibilities" and a poem fell into place...



like midnight baby-watching
of so long ago
i watch and listen
to you
your nighttime movements
is all ok? yes
regular breathing
no fever
i drift back to sleep
thankful
for another day
where you bring me
far more joy
than i you
you see my fearful watching waiting
perhaps these are the demons
with which our ancestors struggled
hope against resignation
trust over terror
they are no less real today
nor any less vulnerable
to the living God
whose name is constantly
on my lips



Two weeks ago it was in the 60s and the snow was fast melting.

This morning, on top of our hill, the snow clung to the trees and ground... reminding us that this is Wisconsin.


Our footbridge over the creek which marks our coming and going. No trolls beneath? See above!

Hope you all are having a great week. Thanks to those who continue to reach out and cover us with love and prayer.

Glancing up from my office this afternoon I see that all the snow has melted. An encouraging sign!

We Can Do This!

I bet many of you can sense that we are entering into a more stable part of the cancer journey by the lack of blog entries. When I started this blog I think I was doing daily entries to try and let folks know what was going on while at the same time trying to keep my own sanity/stability.

Yesterday on our walk Sabine mentioned again that "we can do this!" This was encouraging and really captured the point we are at right now. While energy levels are down and we must continue to monitor the danger of infections there appears to be a certain stability -- a certain knowing of where we are right now -- and, yes, we CAN do this!

Our first overnight to Milwaukee was a big venture and it went well. Between dialysis sessions we have some flexibility (and the future possibility of home dialysis is very encouraging to Sabine -- even if her kidneys don't come back.

Sabine even registered for a 10 mile bike ride yesterday -- despite her low hemoglobin she feels she can get back on the bike this year. All this, with some resistance exercise at Curve, has strengthened not only her body but her resolve. Yes, we can do this. It is not the course we would have chosen if we were asked, but this can be done. The Velcade + dexamethasone is still working and appears to be knocking down the cancer cells as we start our third round with Velcade.

We had a prolonged chemotherapy session on Monday (a major backup at the hospital) but did run into an officer from the PD we both knew who had been battling leukemia for the past year. We he had to say and what we had been experiencing were pretty similar. Friends and family matter. Life is more focused and precious. And considering the alternative, this is not bad!

So, thanks to all of you for the greetings, gifts and birthday cards. You continue to make both my and Sabine's day! Love and blessings to all.

First Road Trip

Here we are at the Pfister Hotel in Milwaukee, an old and grand 19th century building that has been refurbished in the old style... We are in the Cafe having a little smooch while the harpist tunes her instrument. What could be more romantic?

So the first weekend away started with lunch at the Pfister where we had a room for the night and tickets to the Milwaukee Ballet.







We had a lovely dinner at the Mason Street Grill and then it was off to the Pabst Theater.
Another great restoration in Milwaukee is this old theater. (Beer reigns supreme here -- Pabst Theater, Miller Park, etc.).

The international cast of the Milwaukee Ballet presented three exciting new productions. They have some great dancers and we enjoyed the creativity as well as the dance.

Here is picture of Sabine in the lobby at intermission time.



We wound the overnight up with breakfast in bed and then dropped in on our former congregation at St Peter's in nearby North Lake. We got our "birthday blessing" (which has been a tradition of the church) from Fr Seay who was the celebrant this Sunday. It was great to see old friends and our "passing of the peace" was filled with both smiles and tears.

We headed back to Blue Mounds after church and took a long nap!

We also were enfolded with well wishes from friends, kids and family who could not be with us today but who form an important support system for both of us. Thank you!

It was an absolutely wonderful birthday!

A Hill Climbing Birthday for Both of Us!

Celebrating the 70th today!
Climbing Reeve Road hill from Mazomanie on my new Jamis Xenith!

Sabine's got the camera -- but she will be next -- she works out on the bike trainer and will soon be roaring by me!

Tomorrow we are off to Milwaukee for our first night away and celebrating our birthday (we both were born on April 5th). We will be staying at the Pfister and going to the Milwaukee Ballet's performance at the Pabst Theater!

Friends -- the Face of God

One thing that spending time in dialysis does (even if you are the caregive and not the patient) is that you begin to think a little bit more... when doing is not the primary mode of operation anymore...

Sabine reflects quite a lot on what all this is and means. She sees a blessing in her illness (now I know this may startle some of you) but it is true. And now I have come to see the very same thing. This terrible "train wreck," this viscious disease can also be a door to a deeper understanding of God as well as life.

This morning two old friends called me: Noble Wray and Pat Kappenman. Noble is the Chief of Police in Madison whom I worked with for many years and Pat was a fellow pastor when I served St John's in Portage. When people reach out to people, something magic happens -- the mundane becomes the spiritual.

In each case, as I do each time you reach out to us, I felt the outreach of friendly arms and warm hearts -- how often we miss that in our day-to-day hurried existence. How often to we hear from our friends (especially same-gendered friends) that they love you?

These past months have heightened my awareness in so many ways of the importance of friendships and community. God is always a heighty concept. And we struggle to define (and often to ignore) God in our lives, but in "times of trouble" God comes to us not always in a startling angelic vision, but in the deep, awesome intimacy of a friend saying they care...

Thank you all our dear, dear friends -- ALL of you!

Still in the Ring! Round Four Begins...

Sorry to be late on this posting. I know many of you are hoping to find good news on this posting. AND YOU'VE FOUND IT!

At Sabine's consultation yesterday with Dr Sheehan at the UW Cancer Clinic she heard some good news. The nasty little "light chains" that initially clogged up her kidneys have been reduced again for the second time. (For those like me who love numbers: the light chains started out with a population of 10,800, after the first chemotherapy with Velcade and Dexamethasone they were reduced to 1,500, and now after the second round of Velcade and Dex they went down to approx. 200!)

So, we start our fourth round of chemo next week with the same regimen of Velcade and Dex.

Sabine is feeling better and even walked BOTH of our hills! She is in good spirits and starting to boss me around more (a sure sign of getting better.)

We are still in a "wait and see" mode with the kidneys. A good focused prayer would be to ask that those nasty light chains depart from her kidneys and get them fully functioning again.

We both thank you for your prayers. I have said before that we can actually "feel" them and as we know about prayer it is something that works though we know not how. I am a big believer in prayer circles and thanks to those of you who have submitted Sabine's name to church groups. The blessed monk Thomas Merton once said that he believed constant prayer literally held the world together. I can see that it is holding Sabine together and I thank you from the deepest part of my heart.

Onward. Round four. Could be a knockout round!

(p.s. I couldn't help myself, I was trying to find a picture I have of Sabine in full riot gear and just had to post these photos when I couldn't find it!)